I have made a breakthrough in my thinking that I think could benefit others who experience this as well.
I have a tendency to get my hopes up about relationships in particular where I create a scenario in my mind that 100% of the time never comes to fruition. Then I get depressed when the reality sets in that this thing that I hoped for is never going to happen. I find myself someone else to think about to distract me from whatever heartbreak I just experienced and then the cycle continues.
I’ve been trying to change my pattern by just telling myself the truth from the beginning: it will never be. I know that seems depressing but it’s actually really freeing when you are able to get to a place to say those words to yourself and actually believe it. Now I feel not so shitty about the reality of the situation because I’ve already prepared myself for it and accepted it. I won’t be surprised when reality hits. It’s a horrible habit I’ve been trying to break but never knew how until I realized you just have to be upfront with yourself like a good friend would.